ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I'm sobbing to NWA
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Randomize