If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize