im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
