when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Randomize