I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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