Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
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