Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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