but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
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