I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
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