Well apparently he's into motor boating.
wrigley field is MILF paradise
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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