There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Randomize
