YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
You can't just leave with hair like that
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
