i don't plan on having that self control this summer
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Randomize