let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Randomize
