The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
