apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Randomize
