There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
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