I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
