i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize