i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
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