we were pretty classy up until the second keg
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
