plz talk dirty to me
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Randomize
