i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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