woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
