I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
this just has baby written all over it
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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