she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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