its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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