You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Randomize
