talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
