I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I currently don't understand fingers.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
