thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
