I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
