Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
