Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
that is very illegal...i love you.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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