Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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