Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize