Kareoke will never be a sober sport
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
