duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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