Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Just puked most of my soul out..
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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