Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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