Me. At least after what I've been through.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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