Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
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