he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
meet me or not, i'm out of control
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
