who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
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