I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
