I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
