she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
My vagina just recognized that song.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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