This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize