just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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