my sisters under your porch take her home
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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