I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize